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Fuck Heineken




There is an ADOLESCENT BOY. He is AVERAGE. He likes a GIRL who is ABOVE AVERAGE. Reasons for her being ABOVE AVERAGE are unknown, only that she is  better looking than ADOLESCENT BOY and has a GAGGLE OF SNOTTY GIRLFRIENDS WHO ARE LESS ATTRACTIVE THAN HER, yet she isn’t the alpha. She may or may not care about their opinions. She also has a LAME JOCK BOYFRIEND who bullies ADOLESCENT BOY.

ADOLESCENT BOY is being bullied by some ASSHOLES and falls upon a plot being conducted by BIGGER, BADDER ASSHOLES. ADOLESCENT BOY  and his LOUDMOUTH SIDEKICK get in WAY OVER THEIR HEADS. They do not call the police.

Meanwhile, ADOLESCENT BOY begins platonic friendship with GIRL who is still with LAME JOCK BOYFRIEND. LAME JOCK BOYFRIEND threatens to break ADOLESCENT BOY’S face.


BIGGER, BADDER ASSHOLES put GIRL in peril when she comes looking for ADOLESCENT BOY.

LOUDMOUTH SIDEKICK gets mildly injured and becomes even more useless to ADOLESCENT BOY. ADOLESCENT BOY finds INNER STRENGTH and SELF ESTEEM to kick BIGGER BADDER ASSHOLE ass and save GIRL.


Fade in. ADOLESCENT BOY walks through school hallways with GIRL. LAME JOCK BOYFRIEND  sees them and punches a locker. LOUDMOUTH SIDEKICK makes a wisecrack. Cue Sugar Ray tune, fade to black. Roll Credits.

30 Day Song Challenge-Day 20, A Song You Listen To When You’re Angry


or I regress:

This. Is. So. Messed. Up

Sometimes You Stick Out Your Chin and Catch the Rain


This was a post intended for  Wednesday but it has since been extended to include all lessons from the week.

  • Accept that you will not remember anything from more than three days ago.
  • Accept that the day you choose to wear white, you will inevitably spill coffee on yourself before you even enter the workplace.
  • Accept that when you’re feeling exceptionally good about your performance at work, something will be said or done to make you feel like you suck at everything.
  • Remember that they’re wrong. Relish in that fact.
  • Daydream and mentally decorate in the home section at Target. Consider a new feather pillow or mattress pad. Drool over a vacuum sealed coffee mug.
  • Linger a little longer than appropriate when you look at the flats that are encrusted with glitter
  • Smile at the cute boy sitting next to you and say ‘yes’. He’s a good one. Keep smiling about it for the rest of the week.
  • Write a little every day, with or without purpose.
  • Laugh so hard that you may literally bust your stitches.
  • Painting is therapeutic and requires no goal.
  • You don’t need to be reading a magazine when you get your pedicure. Just enjoy the massage chair and your first frappuccino in the last 5 years ( it was half price).
  • Have that beer.
  • Laugh when your aunts blame each other for getting lipstick on your cheek.
  • Make up new dance moves, the old ones are lagging.
  • Sleep in.
  • Screencap Lady Gaga videos without shame.
  • “It ain’t no thing.”

30 Day Yada Yada- Day 19, A Song Off Your Fave Album


It’s almost 4am and I’m a bit sleepy. I also have to tend to children tomorrow. Last track off of Pinkerton, on repeat.

I guess you’re as real as me, maybe I can live with that.

Sigh. Goodnight

30 Day Song Challenge- I Suck


Well, I think at one point I was a day behind, then I was a day ahead. So skipping one day gets me back on track, right?

Wait, how many bullets were in the gun?

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